SPM

Zaman sekolah dulu, SPM was like the penentu of the future. It’s like make it or break it kind of thing. Kalau tak score, maka masa depan gelap gelita gitu. And, what’s more with studying in a boarding school where competition was stiff. I am sure it’s still stiff now, or even more than it used to be then. Anyway, that’s what I thought. I wanted to be proud of myself, make my parents proud and later I wanted to go to good uni. Being 17 and having that eagerness to conquer the world, I took SPM very seriously.

The week before the SPM, juniors semua dah balik. Tinggallah batch from 5 je kat sekolah. Lagilah pressure. Dah lah tinggal sesama sendiri je, pastu tengok orang pulun study macam nak rak. Dengan buat study grouplah, revised last years’ papers lah, stay up lah, bangun awal lah.. God it was horrible! And to top it all, ada pulak yang dapat kertas soalan bocor, boleh?? Gila!

Staying in boarding school since I was in from 1, I have very limited friends outside of the school. Itulah kawan-kawan aku through thick and thin. But ada budak-budak yang masuk masa form 4, they have friends outside. And these people yang mostly dapat soalan bocor. Errrr.. budak batch masuk form 1 pun ada gaklah dapat soalan bocor. I tell you, at that time, focus dah lari. From pulun study habis-habisan, focus on those that potentially akan keluar, bertukar ke carik soalan bocor. The logic is.. kalau budak lemau, CGPA or when I was in MRSM, it was called TPMK (Timbunan Purata Markah Keseluruhan, dek non!) below 2.5, pastu leh score sebab soalan bocor, ofkos rasa tercabar kan? Acik lak memang above 3 punya student. Lagilah tercabar gitu. I tell you, at that eleventh hour, dok sibuk pikir sapa ada kawan kat luar yang ada connection untuk dapat soalan bocor, boleh??? Gila babi punya kes. Don’t ask me how the questions got bocorlah. But it did.

The exam day, of course the first paper would be BM, I tell you, the soalan was sebijik macam soalan bocor. Aku rasa ramai yang senyum-senyum je. Abih paper tu, you think ramai lagi yang ada mood nak study instead of carik soalan bocor??? Hahahahaa.. Errr.. tapi aku study gak lah. Saspen siot kalau soalan bocor yang salah. Mampos! Tapi benonya, cuma soalan BM je bocor. Yang lain, kitorang dok saspek Kementerian tau pasal tu and changed with the other sets of the soalan. Words had it that Kementerian ada a few sets of papers, just to be sure that they are covered if cases like this happened. How true it is, tak tau lak.

And, on the final day of the exam, we had to re-sit BM paper! Hampeh! I jawab BM dua kali, you! And the second time was on the 15th of November 1989.

Anyway, that was back in 1989. After that, somehow, my spirit is not as high as it was then. Don’t know where it went to. Kemalasan membelenggu diri. The spirit to challenge myself became lesser and lesser. And later in life, I learned that SPM is not everything.

There are a lot of people out there that I personally know, didn’t excel in their SPM. But they are doing very well in the real world. These people are the true survivors. You don’t need a piece of certificate to measure your success in this world. The fighting spirit is the one that does. The spirit to keep on going, and to improve oneself continuously. And that has to be coupled up with doa and restu from Allah. And also believe that rezeki itu dari Allah, kita cuma mampu berusaha and manusia cuma penyampai rezeki tu kat kita.

Okay tak ceramah akak untuk hari ini? Hehehehe.. So to those yang nak ambik SPM tu, kalau dah berusaha, bertawakkal lah pada Allah. You have done what need to be done, the rest, berserah. It should teach you for your future life.. that you have to berusaha, and after usaha, tawakkal. Not the other way round yach! Not just tawakkal lak.. Mampos tak ke mana. Hik! Pada mak bapak yang anak nak ambik SPM tu, don’t pressure them now. You should have pressured them months ago. Now is the time to face the music.

Good luck for SPM u ols!!

Angah