Recharged

I just came back to the office today after being away for almost two weeks. Two wonderful weeks. And I think I am recharged.

Taking my time off from work at the beginning of the year is something that I have done for the past few years since I got married. Called it second or third or fourth or whatever honeymoon or whatever you want. It doesn’t matter because to me and Wan it’s ‘our time’. The time normally coincides with either our anniversary based on Hijrah year or based on Masihi year. So it’s either within 12th Rabiulawal or 31st March. What we have done before was to travel. Normally it’s within the country. But this year, we didn’t do that. We thought of going to the east coast but because there weddings in between the dates, we decided not to. Instead, the time was spent between Seremban, Pilah, Melaka and KL. Oh we went to Johor for a short visit as well. And JPO. And that’s in another entry ;)

What happened this time around was I got ‘recharged’. I came back to the office today lightheaded. Not worrying much about work. I found peace with myself – doesn’t matter if it’s only temporary and I am going to start meroyan in the next day or so. Ekekekeke..

I ‘encountered’ soul-searching. I didn’t plan for it, hence ‘encountered’. I think it has a lot to do with the month Rabiulawal – the birth month of our beloved Rasulullah SAW. There’s a lot of ceramahs on tv about him as well on other shows. A lot of things that I learned about him, that I never knew before. I know more about Hang Tuah, the ‘mystical’ figure rather than about our Rasulullah SAW. How lah to call myself a muslim kan? Malu je kan? Urgh. Nyampah dengan diri sendiri. I am sure there a lot more that I don’t know about him. One of the things I learned is that, doing something without knowing that it’s a sunnah Rasulullah SAW won’t give us pahala. But, doing the same thing after knowing that it’s a sunnah and berniat doing it to follow sunnah give us pahala. Duh! Yelah, dosa pahala reward tu suma kerja Allah. Who are we to question it kan. But the point to stress her is knowledge is important. Otherwise, we are wasting a lot of pahala that we could have collected.

Besides watching tv, I did some reading as well. Tak banyak pun and it’s not purely ilmiah. I learned from a magazine that duniawi ni macam air laut. The more we drink, the thirstier we become. And added by a friend.. ended up mati kering. It means that, the more we have, the more we want. It will never be enough. Which is indeed true, at least for me. When I earned so much, I live within my means. And now I am earning more than what I used to, I don’t think my way of life is much better than before. Yes, I don’t have to worry much about money, but still I am not debt free. Lagi banyak duit, lagi banyak hutang orang nak offer. Temptation is always there. Itulah namanya I am sucked into duniawi sangat. Alangkah baiknya kalau lagi tua, lagi banyak ilmu akhirat kan.. Ni tak. Grrrrr..

Probably since there was no stress to kejar duniawi, I can recite some zikir peacefully. Or rather ‘remember’ to zikir. Kalau tak, manjang takde masa. Walhal there’s plenty of time wasted unnecessarily – especially when I layan those angry birds. I should be angry with myself lah! That’s the bad side of iPad. I downloaded many games apps. Salah sendiri. The good side of it is I also downloaded Quran, doa, etc. So basically in the iPad, I have both sides of the world – the good and bad. Got to choose them wisely. Favourite zikir is ‘Ya Wahab’ yang si Put ajar. Pastu got to remember to selawat banyak-banyak ke atas Rasulullah SAW. Important tu. Kata Ustaz Don, masa Rasulullah SAW nak wafat dulu, dalam perbualan dia dengan Jibrail masa nazak tu, Jibrail bagitau yang dia orang pertama masuk syurga pastu diikuti oleh umat dia, then baru orang lain. Somehow if I understand it right, it means that kalau kita dapat masuk syurga, kita akan masuk syurga lebih awal dari nabi-nabi yang lain. So selawat lah banyak-banyak. Itu keuntungan jadik umat Rasulullah SAW.

Anyway, all in all, these are the things that recharged me. Besides that, it helps to be away from home.. err but I was at my parents’ place most of the time. Home jugak, cuma tak serabut mikir nak kemas rumahlah etc.

I just hope that this energy stays for a longggggggggggggggg while with me. I need to keep motivated mentally, physically and spiritually. Basically it’s mind, body and soul. Three different parts of me that requires three different ‘food’. And it’s my responsibility to find the food.

Angah